Stop.
Look.
Listen.
Hush.
amidst the stormy days and endless rains, hope is seen. i finally found my rainbow. and luckily grasped it in time.
Corrupted applications.
Broken phone themes.
Unreliable phone memory.
Deleted birthday and ego-booster messages.
Lost contacts.
I was devastated, not because of my phone but because of the deleted messages that I've been keeping for years. But then, a very sweet little girl secretly texted people and asked them if they could resend their birthday messages for me….
From: Niki
Dahil lab ka namin, itetext ka namin ulit. :)
*ehem* even though the messages were accidentally erased, one thing remains to stay the same: you are loved and special to all of us. You are my soul sister, one of my sources of strength in times of despair, and an angel. Continue to shine. I will always be here for you. Love you, ate kingkay! Smile. :)
From: Madeline
kerey! :))
I love you and i super treasure our friendship kahit na kelan lang tayo naging close :)
Aja sa exam! :)) im always here :)) i love you!
From: Lou
First impressions:
1. Tahimik
2. Nkkhyang iapproach
3. Bka di ko mging kaclose
REALIZATIONS:
1. Sobrang daldal, lahat ng sasabihin nya super mabbless ka.
2. Pwde mo lapitan ANYTIME. Trust worthy. Lge maaasahan.
3. Naging pinakapaborito kong tita na super loooove ko :)
PLUS ...
4. Masarap mang hug.
5. Masarap mgtmpla ng coffee
6. Masarap iyakan
7. Super wonderful person :)
words aren't enaf. I LOVE YOU TITA KEREN :))
HAPPY BIRTHDAY. i wish u ol the dcres of ur hart. I wish u'l c urself d way i c u so dt ul know hw wondrful person u r :*
From: Reg
We love yooou!
From: Jedy
i love u ate keren! hinay2 lng s pg aaral,kya natin 2! hehe. stay sweet and caring and kind and beautiful and smart and God loving and ano pa b? hehe. *hugz and kisses*
From: Rox
Ate keren :) miss na kta :) loves y0u much :) pahug aq <:D>
Dahil d kta ngreet nung birthday mo.. BINABATI KTA NG MALIGAYANG KAARAWAN :) y0u br0ught so much blessings in my life.. Happy happy birthday :) i love y0u :-*
From:Ryan
Happy Birthday Ate Keren! Thank you so much for all the love and the friendship. It really means so much to me. Alam mo yun, kasi you're one of the people I appreciate the most na. As in super. Di ko alam kung pano iexpress basta alam mo na yun. Hahaha. God Loves you so much! So do I :D Labyuuu! <:D>
From: Igi
Maganda, mabaet, sweet, matalino, mahal ng lahat at marami pa kasi hnd mauubusan ng mga papuri para sakanya:) Ako yan :D haha! Joke! Yan ang tita Keren ko :) good night<:D> sweet dreams. I love you :)
Happy birthday :)
belated happy birthday
advance happy birthday
hehe <:D>
From: Mommy Cookie and Daddy Pao
Hi nak!:-) again belated hapi bday!:-) its our honor to be d parents of a very loving, gifted, amazing and wonderful sister, servant, daughter and top board passer and excellent cpa.. Amen! Thank u 4 trusting us with ur stories, feelngs and iyak!:-) d2 lang kmi palagi 4 u. We love u so much! Bless many! Live love! Hug! Mwuah! Mommy & daddy
From: Erika Coralde
happy 1st day of xmas! :-D
i stilL h0n0r you for just being the way you are.peksman.
Pgnai2sip q un cAmp,naaalala q agad kung panO mO kme niLead s w0rShip.at dat m0ment..i toLd myseLf...i want u to be my ment0r.nasag0t agad un pRayer q n gs2 q ng inspirati0n s pgse2rve.at ikaw un.:-D kht d m0 n bday..atleast xmas nMn t0day.i love you te keren.haha
From: Kuya Edsel
Happy birthday shobe!!ü hope you had a great day!!ü sorry late greeting... Ngyn Lang nagka load... Hahaü mwah! Take care. Good night!ü
Shobz, heard u erased your bday messages...:( I sent you the exact message I sent you on your bday...ü cheer up ok? I'm passing by soon.ü
From: 09228103018
happy bday po ü
It felt like I had two birthdays in a year. Thank you for loving me this much. :)
Dear Keren,
You don't have to prove yourself to anyone. If you know yourself, you don't need to and you don't bother.
Keep on believing in your genius,
God
P.S. Know your worth, Keren. If you don't know it, no one will.
For the past few days, I've been thinking a lot. I'm pressured. I'm burdened. I always feel that I need to prove my worth. But here he goes again, telling me for the nth time that I know my worth and I need not to prove anyone. I can do all things through You who strengthens me. I love You always! <3
It was a long Sunday. And as much as I wanted to write all my thoughts in this blog entry, I don't know if my mind can still contain them by the time I finished writing this. So before they expire, here is a short (hopefully short) story how God revealed Himself to me again today.
The day didn't start the way I planned it. Early in the morning, I was deeply burdened by many factors (which I intend not to disclose in this blog entry) which made me feel helpless, weak and disgusted about myself. I even came to a point where I was already thinking of taking a sabbatical leave from my service, contact no one, and just be quiet for the rest of the week. I already planned on not texting anyone, not attending the music practice and even Feast Manila. I was that down, I just wanted to detach from the world and run to a secret hiding place where I can be alone and just be with myself. I know that my life was filled with love especially for the past week, but I just didn't see myself as a significant being. Don't worry, I don't have suicidal tendencies, I didn't intend to die. I just wanted to be quiet, reflect and cry. At the back of my mind, I was already contemplating why am I so sensitive? Why am I like this? Is it just because of my upcoming visitor? Or is it because of something else? I wanted to cry. I wanted to run away from people so they won't see me crying. But in the end, I found myself helpless, sitting on one of the comfortable chairs in PICC with tears heavily flowing from my eyes.
During the worship, I felt that God was there, looking at me, smiling, waiting for me to dry my tears then hug Him after. He was there telling me "Oi Keren, halika nga dito, umiiyak ka na naman, andito naman Ako." There were fears, I've been crying so much lately and I was really scared, but He was there, reminding me again just to TRUST Him. He was there, reassuring me that my gift is a blessing to others and I should use it and not just keep it to myself, it is a gift meant to be shared.
God even spoke to me during the ministry heads meeting. (Btw, Tito Rolly called me "bunso" when I was about to speak and my heart jumped for joy. :D) He wants to maximize me. He wants to use the total of me to be one of His instruments in leading His youth to Him. He reminded me that I should be more preoccupied by those whom we're trying to reach, that we are in a constant journey of making things better and everything that we have must be intentional. Community is about love, genuine concern for others and allowing them to see God in you. He wants us to be excellent, to do all what is humanly possible so that the Holy Spirit may do what is humanly impossible. He wants me to learn to innovate, to love improvement and to love new things and be reminded that if old things didn't work, then don't continue. He wants me not to be afraid in committing mistakes. He wants me to build relationships, create excellence and show love.
At the end of the day, I found myself happily sitting at the back of the car of the couple who brought my parents to Light of Jesus Community 25 years ago. (Thank you Tito Ed and Chay Santiago for my ride home.)
I am Keren Graine Cañete Mallari, God's strong maiden, ready to fight the demon, willing to shed tears for others, inspired and driven to make the LOJ-Youth Missions a place of excellent love.
I am God's anointed intercessor, I am God's servant, I am God's powerful champion, and because I am blessed and loved, I can bless the world and give love. In Jesus Name.
"That happiness, it is not the one you have from finding an old lost love because that love was never lost and it will always have a special place in your heart. Rather, it's the happiness of finding your old friend whom you've thought you will never find again."
I loveD him. And even though things didn't work out between the two of us, that love made me stronger and wiser. I'm happy that he already found the one love that he's waiting for all this time.
And I know someday I will find my love too….
(or maybe I already did, just waiting for the right time. ^_^)